


Frank and Sadie Doyle in Auctions are for the Dogs

by lalalalalawhy



Category: The Thrilling Adventure Hour
Genre: F/M, Frank Doyle is a dog person, Heavy Drinking
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2015-03-21
Updated: 2015-03-21
Packaged: 2018-03-18 22:54:28
Rating: General Audiences
Warnings: Creator Chose Not To Use Archive Warnings
Chapters: 1
Words: 1,159
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/3587085
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/lalalalalawhy/pseuds/lalalalalawhy
Summary: <blockquote class="userstuff">
              <p>It’s time to send the little ones to dreamland and set your radio’s dial to “spooky.” Bolt the doors, lock your windows, and steel yourself for mysterious suspense as we take you… Beyond Belief.</p><p>Join Frank and Sadie Doyle, fresh from their first visit to an auction house! They may have just found a new hobby, as well as something else entirely...</p>
            </blockquote>





	Frank and Sadie Doyle in Auctions are for the Dogs

“Sadie my love, what a day! That was much more exciting than previously imagined!” Sadie smiled up at Frank from her position on the auction house couch in the auction house’s bar.

“How wonderful of the auction house to have thought ahead and built a bar for us,” Sadie remarked, gesturing at the room. “Frank darling, before you sit down: be a dear and bring us some more excitement.”

“By excitement I assume you mean drink, and, never fear, I managed to snag an antique bottle of whiskey, guaranteed to be the one that began the rebellion of the same name.” Frank leaned toward her. “ _Were you aware this house auctions booze?_ ” he whispered in Sadie's ear.

“I was not! What a wonderful discovery!”

Sadie watched as Frank poured out two glasses and handed one over. “To rebellious whiskey, and to auctions, which I have just realized are my third favorite thing in the entire world.”

“Oh? And what are your first two?” Sadie asked, well aware of the answer.

“Why that would be you, my dear, and alcohol.” Frank answered. “Do not ask me to order them further.”

“Oh darling, I would never.”

The Doyles raised their glasses and a resounding ~CLINK~ rang out.

“Sade, when this day began, I had no idea I would be picking up a new hobby.”

“Why, it’s almost a blessing that our breakfast martinis were interrupted by the auctioneer looking for help with her pesky poltergeist,” Sadie said.

“Sadie, dear, think about what you are saying!” Frank exclaimed. Sadie reviewed the last few seconds and gasped. “That’s right dear,” Frank continued, “we must never encourage them to interrupt our breakfast martinis, even in private conversation. We never know whose ears may be listening.”

“Speaking of ears, Frank, do you happen to see some rather floppy ones poking around that door frame?” Sadie asked.

“Why, yes I do!” Frank said. “And, Sadie, do you see a rather canine snout connected to them?”

“Why, Frank. That’s the snuffliest canine snout I’ve ever seen!” Sadie said. “Yoo-hoo,” she called to the creature, “come out where we can see you! And I warn you, we are well into our bottle of hard-won whiskey and are not looking to fight any sort of preternatural being.”

“Hear-hear,” said Frank.

~CLINK~

From around the doorframe emerged a very normal looking dog. It was almost all black, but with brown paws and two quizzical looking brown spots directly above its eyes. The dog stood about hip-high and managed to look almost regal, but for its exceedingly silly floppy ears. The lolling tongue and quizzical brows only served to further Sadie’s impression of a silly creature.

“Why Frank, it’s a dog!” Sadie said, managing to fit at least three syllables into the single word.

“Sadie, I believe you’re right,” Frank said. “And I believe it is coming this way.”

“What type of dog do you suppose it is?” Sadie asked. “Is it an Akita? American foxhound? Basset hound? Boxer? Corgi? Chow-chow?”

“Let me stop you there, Sadie,” Frank said. “I do believe it is part doberman and part something else entirely. Something with very floppy ears.” Frank tousled the dog’s ears. “Who’s a good dog who is not entirely a doberman?” The dog looked up at him with a loving expression and closed its eyes, basking in the head rubs it was getting.

The dog collapsed, rolling so all four legs were in the air. Sadie gasped.

“Frank! Is it injured?”

“No, Sadie darling,” Frank said, sliding down onto the floor, “I believe this good pup is in need of some belly rubs.”

“Why Frank! You’re a regular James Herriot of the canine set! How did you come to be so knowledgeable about dogs?” Sadie declined to express her surprise that he was sitting on the floor and petting a creature whose fur was clearly getting all over his well-appointed pants. Frank’s shoulders had all but lost the tension they always held when venturing outside their apartment, and he was making murmuring noises to the dog as he scritched its belly.

“Oh, you know, Sade, you pick up a few things here and there. I myself had a very cunning canine companion for many years before we met.”

Sadie nodded to herself. Frank didn’t often speak of his life prior to their meeting, and she knew better than to enquire further. Perhaps someday he would tell her all about it.

“Well, Frank,” she said, “I think we will need to return to this auction house next week. I heard tell they will be auctioning off a cask of rum recovered from the hold Black Beard himself!”

“Why, Sadie, we’d best be on hand to take it off theirs.” Frank looked up at her from the floor and gestured for his drink. Sadie reached over and gave it to him.

~CLINK~

“Moreover,” Sadie said, “I daresay you have found a new friend. We must come back to visit them, and soon.”

Frank looked up at her, grateful. “I’ll drink to that,” he said.

~CLINK~

 

* * *

  

**Epilogue:**

“Donna, you’ll never believe it!” Sadie said over drinks with her best friend the very next day. “Our Frank is a,” she lowered her voice conspiratorially, “ _dog person_.”

“Oh, does he need advice on that? I’m sure Dave would be more than happy to talk to a fellow member of the pack.”

“Oh, Donna, you are a regular card. No, I simply mean that Frank is very taken with a canine we found living in the auction house we visited yesterday.”

“You got Frank to leave the house? By choice?”

“Oh, Donna. You know how he loves to help people. Eventually. And if I’m going. And if we are well-supplied with abundant liquor to sustain us from the time away from our beloved liquor cabinet. Besides, the auction house master was having difficulty with a particularly pesky poltergeist and said we were the only people who could possibly help.” Sadie explained.

“A poltergeist? Sadie you have to be careful. You are still mortal and those can be really nasty.”

“Well, they can be, but it turns out it was all a silly misunderstanding. You see, the poltergeist thought that flinging the paddles at the auctioneer was the correct way to bid on an item! We had a little bit of a chat, wherein I enlightened her to proper auction house manners, and Frank discussed what items someone from beyond the pale might actually find use of, e.g. not a very fine example of baroque fire pokers.”

“So, the auction was a success?” Donna asked, sipping her Bloody Mary-with-emphasis-on-the-blood.

“Oh yes. We got a very fine bottle of rebellion whiskey, which was delicious! Frank found a new dog friend that we can visit whenever we like, and the poltergeist successfully bid on a beautiful cursed ruby necklace that she can comfortably wear while haunting.”

Sadie sat back and smiled. It had been a very successful day indeed.

**Author's Note:**

> Thanks especially to the Maddies, who introduced me to the concept of Frank Doyle, dog person, and to [arsenikitty](http://archiveofourown.org/users/arsenikitty) for beta'ing this!
> 
> Additionally, if you have not yet seen [this video of Sadie Doyle reading a list of dog breeds](https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=m8tOiqrIAOQ), please do yourself a favor and watch it.


End file.
